Fall

Fall is always a good time for me.

Something about the air.
something about how the light is always orange..
angles, atmosphere, bending light, turning it in from dark.

Trump was elected on Tuesday. Compassion, turn on high.
Hope. Hold on.

Now I'm watching videos on youtube about it.

I feel really good today.
Sumo and I had a really great giggly morning.
Then I dropped her off at work.
Then I got a bunch of syc work done.
Stretched.
Made tincture water and a nice tea blend.
I'm going to put my buchi in containers either tonight or tomorrow.
going to pick up sumo from work at 5, and I wanna take her for a drink at cider house.
then we may hangout with Sammy. I want to create mantra art.

some celebrities have some wisdom. white privelage, to be able to have access to the knowledge that all always have access to: yourself. It's crazy, right? It seems only those that are privileged are given the opportunity to know that meditation and self-awareness and being present in the moment are the only way out of your mind. Go inside your mind to get out of it. Go inside your mind to get out of the torture.

"I will not stay uninspired by whats inspired me. Being inspired, courage, brave, Bold, and active into your own future and everyones future.. depends on you. thats within your own circle of influence. I'm not going to say that 'we lose' because that's a waste of time. We're all going to lose no matter what, it's the journey that counts, its how we collabarate with each other that counts. "

Fall...
A time of seclusion, reclusion, inclusion.
subtraction, from normal life.
reflection, for my own sake.
a time where I can validate staying inside all day, stretching, thinking, reading, healing...
the light is orange, the feelings are transformational

it doesn't have to sound right to feel right. I am expression.
I am an endless sea of thoughts. but that is not me. I am not thoughts. I am ME.
what is me? what is feeling? Humanity is feeling. Humanity is emotion. WE are not human. WE are NOT our emotions. So then what is? Humans are emotions. So.. for us to deny those emotions, we are denying the essence of being human. what is a human without humanness? A machine? A vessel that lacks compassion, empathy.. only expresses lower vibrational emotions.. the primal, instinctual ones. fear. aggression. but we are much more than primal. look how far we have come? shouldn't we start acting like it?

FALL -  A TIME TO REFLECT
a time to mourn the years losses, but to magikly feel renewed at the loss. to feel like everything is exactly, how, it, is, supposed, to, be.
A time to feel the deepest parts of yourself.
dig deeper.
feel. focus. breathe. get comfortable.
also a time to be cold.. adjustment. stay loose, keep stretching, do what you need to do for yourself to remain calm, happy, fearless, full of light.

learn from the orange light. take it in, feel it's refraction, its evening warmth, angles, refraction.
we are human, in this life. I am not human. I have taken on this human identity, so that I may learn the lessons that my karmic life needs to learn. so that I may learn unconditional love. love without conditions.

patience, gratitude, love, essence of being, self-care, effective and open communication.

Those ones.. the ones that bicker at you, look down upon you, treat you with disrespect. they are treating themselves with disrespect. they are here to learn their own lessons, and whatever they may be, they are INTENSE. they will learn quickly, when it comes their time. they will feel the love inside their heart, and they can deny truth no more. Just keep writing. for peace, for change, for hope, and love.

keep writing to find yourself, to be yourself. who are you? who am I? I. I. I. It is I. I am myself. I am me.

I am grateful today for
- my kitties
- my plants
- my home
- my tinctures
- kombucha
- batman
- fall lighting
- sunny days in the fall
- suzanne morgan
- my tight knit clan
- I'm grateful for the opportunities that life gives me everyday to learn lessons from those that surround me. This life is a classroom, I know this, and I am grateful to be able to share information that I was granted access to.

So, why. me? why me? this is to you, source. spirit, god? why me? I know there are reasons, mostly mathematical. but... I'm searching for some kind of answer. what is it? what am I searching for, even? a friend to be like.. OH YES THAT'S HAPPENED TO ME. Anthony? similar things have happened to him.

Please grant me the strength to be myself around him. to TRULY open up to him. to love myself enough to not be scared to openly express myself.